So I've got an outstanding father. However, if I were to identify one discrete failing of my father it would be that he is an absolute snooze/enigma to shop for. I've heard rumor that this must be some sort of late onset Y-chromosomal related disorder and that I'm not the only one that is at a perennial loss as to what to put under dear old Dad's Christmas tree. To further explain this point let's play a game a la family feud.
Things you buy a fifty year old man;
Survey says:
1-Golf Paraphernalia: I can't imagine my dad on a golf course unless he's watching a cross country race.
2-Power Tools: I'll let my mom answer why this one isn't needed.
3-Grill gear: Don't need to ask where I get it from.
4-Tickets to a game: Dad would like these I think but he lives in Cedar City.
5-A nice watch: he has one that is sufficient for his needs but will not become an heirloom piece.
6-Hobby gear: you know for fishing, hunting, cycling, tennis etc.
Things you buy an eighty-year old man:
Survey says:
1-Mixed nuts
2-Socks
3-A puzzle
4-A book with extra large print
5-A calendar.
6-Sweats
7-Nothing.
This second list is eerily similar to what I've gotten for dad in various combinations for the last 7 Christmases. The lameness of my gift giving was always a source of concern until just this year.
I'm now a father who's recieving gifts from his children. Although my daughter's a little bit young to quite know what gift-giving is all about, she has already given me a gift that I couldn't be happier with: she's potty trained. The fact that increasingly her business is no longer my business is gift enough for the next several Christmases.
And I look back at several other advancements she's made and I consider those gifts too. For example, she feeds herself now (when she chooses to eat). Second she talks even while she's crying. Third she can walk so I don't always have to carry her. Her neck supports her head even. She's given me a lot that makes my life considerably easier that it has been at some point of her existence.
She'll grow out of a car seat eventually (maybe by the time she'll be able to drive herself places) . She'll eventually learn how to make her own money to spend and hopefully govern herself as a fully contributing member to society.
In short I guess I'm trying to say, Dad this isn't just a can of nuts it's a can of nuts from an adult who does most all of the things a good adult should do. Merry Christmas and Thanks for helping me get here.
3 comments:
I will always get a chuckle when remembering the infamous golfball soaps that Stephanie and I got for dad one year for Christmas. I mean, what a terrible gift on so many levels. I mean, first, what man wants to rub soap shaped like a golfball all over his body and second, if you accidentally drop it in the shower, it would roll all over, not to mention it could be quite deadly if you stepped on it. And like you mentioned, Dad doesn't even golf! Should have gotten him a Snickers Candy bar. Sorry dad. I can't even say 'it's the thought that counts' because clearly there was no thinking going on.
Yikes, I've pretty much got dad everything on the 2nd list and it's a list I would enjoy as well. Numerically, I'm closer to the first list but I must be feeling closer to the second. Teaching first grade will do that to you especially the week of Christmas break.
Sorry, I'm a little late commenting on a post written in my honor. If you want to know Judson, this blog has been a wonderful Christmas gift for all of us, but especially your dear "old" parents.
It's nice to get "the rest of the story" ten years later on everything from "playing follow the teenager" at the First Christmas devotional to memories of "twelve days door rapping" and the many "gifts of love" from all of you kids. I do remember that rope on the soap by the way, Rachel.
I will say this. Pictures of the grandkids always make me smile. Reading about all of your latest adventures in parent-land are also very "therapeutic" and relaxing for me. I do love to read, but lately that has fallen by the way side with my latest "online obsession" (don't worry, it's a good thing... I think).
How about a book of "prompts", for older people (like me)? Things that may come in handy a few years down the road, like how to open a child proof pill bottle, or where's the best place to find the milk. Simple things like that.
Anyway, Judson, I do appreciate all the work you've done with the milk... I mean blog. I marvel at how you've been able to keep up with it, and everything else you've got going on. Perhaps Jan could enlighten us all on that topic in a few days.
Don't worry about what you buy for me at Christmas time. For me, it really is the thought that counts, and I'm really not very good at dropping hints... if you haven't noticed.
Dad
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