You're here today, which we appreciate.
We know that for many of you the week is about to become increasingly busy, so the fact that you thought of us and decided to put that thought into action by coming here means a lot.
First please vote: My Dad's Eyes http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Second: Enjoy today's post.
Today's post is centered around this Palmer video moment. It was filmed during Ryan's last activation. Rachel wanted him to have a feel for what daily life was like for her and the girls. Emma is definitely the star here (at the time she's just over three), Sophie (the second) is an extra on the set. The other baby is a cousin that Rachel was watching. The only other background information you need is previous experience of playing hide and go seek, which if you don't know already is played like this.
I'll let you get to the business of laughing. Hopefully it will help you stay warm.
I have on good authority that what wasn't funny then to Emma is now hilarious. Some times doing (or saying) exactly what your kids are asking you to do, is the last thing they want.
Take home lessons for me:
• Document things that might seem mundane; sometimes the ordinary becomes the most precious.
• When someone doesn't do what you want them to do or in the way you want them to do it, don't assume the problem is them. Perhaps the problem is not with them but with you and how you're asking.
• Enjoy all of the stages of your child's development. I saw a lot of similarities between where my child is at and the star of this video. Knowing what I know about 'present' Emma and her polite and calm demeanor both gives me hope that my fireball daughter will cool down but also makes me kind of sad to think they don't always stay the same. I should probably enjoy it more in the moment.
• You need very little resource investment to create a fun and happy environment for your child's development. You are the most expensive, interactive, entertaining, and educational 'toy' your child could ever have. Give them your time and not so much stuff.
Have a very happy albeit busy and likely very cold Thanksgiving Eve.
Travel Safely.
Vote: (My Dad's Eyes in the humorous category) http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Get anyone you can think of to do the same.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Daily Read #13: Giving In and Giving Up: A story of Cats and Cadets.
The end is getting closer and we feel that we're getting even more support.
Thank You for voting (My Dad's Eyes: http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Thank you for convincing friends/family/neighbors/co-workers/strangers to do the same thing.
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There have been many moments when I've thought 'you know Rachel and Ryan are really good parents.' [I have yet to have the same positive self-affirmation of my own fathering but maybe given a few more years...].
Good Parents don't parent from their list of personal preferences. They look through the lenses of what is best for their children not what is best for themselves. Consequently they often do things they would choose to do last and don't do things that they would choose to do first if their only litmus test was themselves.
Ryan and Rachel have shown that they know when to give in and when to give up and have done so under very personally challenging circumstances.
For Rachel, it was the day she let the girls get a cat. Now, you have to know a little bit about my family to know that this was quite a monumental occasion.
We once had two young men serving missions for our church eat dinner with us; one of the two was originally from Mongolia. Apparently Mongolians feel about the same way as I think everyone in our immediate family does about cats. The American shared a story with us about the Mongolian and the extent of his feline aversion.
The missionaries were visiting a woman who owns a store in town and who I guess let her cat come with her to work the store when she did. [Now the only thing more difficult to understand than owning a pet is never leaving the pet]. So the cat was in the store and once the cat's presence was known to the Mongolian missionary he insisted that they leave saying either the cat left or or he left but he wouldn't stay in the same room with it. His companion tried to help him understand that running away wasn't reasonable and the woman insisted that as missionaries they should love all of God's creatures. He locked eyes with the woman and in his best broken English said with no hesitation, 'The Cat is not God's creature, it is the Creature of the Devil.'
I think the American was sharing the story as kind of way to say, 'Ha ha Crazy Mongolian', and maybe make us all laugh. We might have guffawed to be polite but I think immediately after the story ended we all turned to the Mongolian missionary and very solemnly said, I totally understand where you're coming from.
Rachel because of some mild allergies has an even strong dislike of cats than most of us which is like saying that because it has a paper cut Slug A dislikes salt more than Slug B. We've long made jokes about one of us becoming a crazy cat person, but rarely does that joke include Rachel. But maybe it should.
Rachel's oldest developed felinephilia (a cat obsession) about 2 years ago. She was drawing cats, reading books about on cats, asking for cat toys, talking about cats, trying to find stray cats; It was cats, cats, cats all day every day* [Is there a minimum age for becoming a crazy cat lady?]. She had an impressive clowder* of cats but they were all 2 dimensional and hand colored or cut from magazines, coloring books or the internet. *[According to Oxford that is what you call a collection of cats]
When a practical need arose to get an outside cat in the form of family of mice moving into their shed, the heavens aligned in Emma's good favor; the resistance dropped and the Palmer's moved from a family of 5 to a family of 6 when Buddy joined the crew.
Apparently Buddy is everything a cat should be: smart*, cute*, helpful* and best of all outside ***[to the extent possible for a cat]. Buddy's three moms, every Palmer girl but Rachel, are everything they should be and at least as of the last 6 months have held up their end of the Buddy Deal. [Which I find impressive; within a week of our parents caving and letting us get a fish tank, we had lost all interest. The tank turned into a fish production of Lord of the Flies as they turned on each other and resorted to cannibalism to stay alive. The ones who did however were a very hearty bunch. We had to put up with an unkempt tank for years before the last two standing finally died.]
Rachel has been a true sport and Buddy and her have a relationship like that of many stepmoms/first wives: they both love the children but give each other their space where ever possible. I will admit Rachel's called me very late at night from the cat food aisle at the grocery store wondering when she became everything she didn't want to be--a cat lady. [Relax, Rach they call it a good mom, you don't earn the title of cat lady until all your kids are gone and then you still have a cat and not just one but scores.]
Next as mentioned above a good dad knows when he has to put his preferences and ambitions on the sacrificial alter of fatherhood. I can think of one time in particular where Ryan's action in this regard was very impressive.
Shortly after Ryan returned from Morocco, he/maybe Rachel stumbled across a position for an Athletic Trainer* for an all-boys military academy in Virginia. *[This is actually where Ryan's real passion/educational expertise would be best suited but in Utah we're lucky if we can afford to have teachers at our school let alone anything else]. With his military resume to go with his other job qualifications, the job really was a perfect fit.
Not surprisingly he quickly raced through the screening rounds and before he knew it he and Rachel were on a paid for flight to visit the school for an interview and get a better feel for all that the change would include. They loved everything about it* *[except for maybe the thought of being thousands of miles away from me:]. The interview went really well. The job specifications were even better sounding in context. The South was charming and exceeded its expectations for hospitality which were high.
And these were just a few reasons why it should be no surprise that Ryan was offered the job and why I thought for sure Ryan would take the job. You know how the story ends. Ryan wouldn't have ended up sweeping up sheet rock dust a year later if he had been taping rolled ankles and stretching hamstrings at a military academy. Ryan did what good dads do; he gave it a lot of thought, sought counsel from a much wiser Being than himself, and did what was best for the family. It was a perfect fit for Ryan Palmer it was not a perfect fit for the Palmer family.
It can't be easy to pass by something that looks so good, it can't be easy to bring something home that you already can't stand.
Being a good parent isn't easy.
But with Lasik it will be easier for Ryan to see his 3 reasons why it is worth it.
Thanks for voting: http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Thanks for shamelessly promoting us!
Thanks for being a good person.
Thank You for voting (My Dad's Eyes: http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Thank you for convincing friends/family/neighbors/co-workers/strangers to do the same thing.
----------------------------------------------------------
There have been many moments when I've thought 'you know Rachel and Ryan are really good parents.' [I have yet to have the same positive self-affirmation of my own fathering but maybe given a few more years...].
Good Parents don't parent from their list of personal preferences. They look through the lenses of what is best for their children not what is best for themselves. Consequently they often do things they would choose to do last and don't do things that they would choose to do first if their only litmus test was themselves.
Ryan and Rachel have shown that they know when to give in and when to give up and have done so under very personally challenging circumstances.
For Rachel, it was the day she let the girls get a cat. Now, you have to know a little bit about my family to know that this was quite a monumental occasion.
We once had two young men serving missions for our church eat dinner with us; one of the two was originally from Mongolia. Apparently Mongolians feel about the same way as I think everyone in our immediate family does about cats. The American shared a story with us about the Mongolian and the extent of his feline aversion.
The missionaries were visiting a woman who owns a store in town and who I guess let her cat come with her to work the store when she did. [Now the only thing more difficult to understand than owning a pet is never leaving the pet]. So the cat was in the store and once the cat's presence was known to the Mongolian missionary he insisted that they leave saying either the cat left or or he left but he wouldn't stay in the same room with it. His companion tried to help him understand that running away wasn't reasonable and the woman insisted that as missionaries they should love all of God's creatures. He locked eyes with the woman and in his best broken English said with no hesitation, 'The Cat is not God's creature, it is the Creature of the Devil.'
I think the American was sharing the story as kind of way to say, 'Ha ha Crazy Mongolian', and maybe make us all laugh. We might have guffawed to be polite but I think immediately after the story ended we all turned to the Mongolian missionary and very solemnly said, I totally understand where you're coming from.
Rachel because of some mild allergies has an even strong dislike of cats than most of us which is like saying that because it has a paper cut Slug A dislikes salt more than Slug B. We've long made jokes about one of us becoming a crazy cat person, but rarely does that joke include Rachel. But maybe it should.
Rachel's oldest developed felinephilia (a cat obsession) about 2 years ago. She was drawing cats, reading books about on cats, asking for cat toys, talking about cats, trying to find stray cats; It was cats, cats, cats all day every day* [Is there a minimum age for becoming a crazy cat lady?]. She had an impressive clowder* of cats but they were all 2 dimensional and hand colored or cut from magazines, coloring books or the internet. *[According to Oxford that is what you call a collection of cats]
When a practical need arose to get an outside cat in the form of family of mice moving into their shed, the heavens aligned in Emma's good favor; the resistance dropped and the Palmer's moved from a family of 5 to a family of 6 when Buddy joined the crew.
Apparently Buddy is everything a cat should be: smart*, cute*, helpful* and best of all outside ***[to the extent possible for a cat]. Buddy's three moms, every Palmer girl but Rachel, are everything they should be and at least as of the last 6 months have held up their end of the Buddy Deal. [Which I find impressive; within a week of our parents caving and letting us get a fish tank, we had lost all interest. The tank turned into a fish production of Lord of the Flies as they turned on each other and resorted to cannibalism to stay alive. The ones who did however were a very hearty bunch. We had to put up with an unkempt tank for years before the last two standing finally died.]
Rachel has been a true sport and Buddy and her have a relationship like that of many stepmoms/first wives: they both love the children but give each other their space where ever possible. I will admit Rachel's called me very late at night from the cat food aisle at the grocery store wondering when she became everything she didn't want to be--a cat lady. [Relax, Rach they call it a good mom, you don't earn the title of cat lady until all your kids are gone and then you still have a cat and not just one but scores.]
Next as mentioned above a good dad knows when he has to put his preferences and ambitions on the sacrificial alter of fatherhood. I can think of one time in particular where Ryan's action in this regard was very impressive.
Shortly after Ryan returned from Morocco, he/maybe Rachel stumbled across a position for an Athletic Trainer* for an all-boys military academy in Virginia. *[This is actually where Ryan's real passion/educational expertise would be best suited but in Utah we're lucky if we can afford to have teachers at our school let alone anything else]. With his military resume to go with his other job qualifications, the job really was a perfect fit.
Not surprisingly he quickly raced through the screening rounds and before he knew it he and Rachel were on a paid for flight to visit the school for an interview and get a better feel for all that the change would include. They loved everything about it* *[except for maybe the thought of being thousands of miles away from me:]. The interview went really well. The job specifications were even better sounding in context. The South was charming and exceeded its expectations for hospitality which were high.
And these were just a few reasons why it should be no surprise that Ryan was offered the job and why I thought for sure Ryan would take the job. You know how the story ends. Ryan wouldn't have ended up sweeping up sheet rock dust a year later if he had been taping rolled ankles and stretching hamstrings at a military academy. Ryan did what good dads do; he gave it a lot of thought, sought counsel from a much wiser Being than himself, and did what was best for the family. It was a perfect fit for Ryan Palmer it was not a perfect fit for the Palmer family.
It can't be easy to pass by something that looks so good, it can't be easy to bring something home that you already can't stand.
Being a good parent isn't easy.
But with Lasik it will be easier for Ryan to see his 3 reasons why it is worth it.
Thanks for voting: http://contest.hoopesvision.com/vote.html
Thanks for shamelessly promoting us!
Thanks for being a good person.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Daily Read #12: Laughter is the only medicine
Have you voted? Please do. Give us one more thing to be grateful for this week! By voting every day. Only 7 more chances: use every one!
My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
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To quote the marketing campaign of Laughing Cow Cheese. Have you laughed today?
More importantly have you laughed at yourself today?
Our family are proponents of laughing at yourself, which basically means if you aren't going to laugh at yourself you are going to be the only one not laughing but we won't let that stop the rest of us.
For some reason even the most horrifically mortifying experience that could happen to a young person* is almost instantly tempered if you can somehow muster to laugh about it.*[Or old person, I for one am not finished doing exceptionally embarrassing things even daily] Not to mention with researchers showing that laughter lengthens life, you are diffusing what the melodramatic part of you thinks 'just might kill you from embarrassment' and gives you even more time in mortality to laugh about it.
Take this family favorite story about the blog's current heroine Rachel for example.
She had fairly recently turned 16. Our family was on a grand expedition back East touring family, church and American History sites. As has already been proven by this weblog family vacations are a great way to mix things up just enough that everything becomes instantly more memorable and usually for very good reason.
On this particular vacation we had been to probably close to 20 church visitors centers which again is great because a). They're free; b). They've got very clean restrooms; c) they're usually not crowded d). they help you stay awake in Sunday School particularly when you're able to spend time thinking about this particular story* *[Just be sure to be able to explain the reason for your muffled laughter].
So we're at the Hill Cumorah Visitors Center. It's a Sunday so we had finished church earlier in the day and hadn't been anywhere we could change yet. Again another reason why church history sites are nice--you don't stand out nearly as much if your family is in white shirts & ties or dresses.
So as mentioned, we were always making sure we used a restroom at the Church history site because regardless of how many other stops we were making in a day there were no guarantees you wouldn't contract a communicable disease if you had to use their restroom.
Rachel had slipped away from our tour group to use the bathrooms which were on the other side of the visitor's center and said hi to a set of Elders [Male missionaries likely between the ages of 19-21] as she passed them at a help desk.
Rachel finished in the restroom and came out to join us again. She smiled as she approached the help desk and they smiled back. As she passed the desk and continued to walk towards us, one of the missionaries called out to her, 'Sister!' naturally she turned back only to see him pointing down and shout 'Your Dress!'.
Instinctively Rachelfirst put her hands down the back of her dress which she felt ended just at her waist where dress gave way to nylon. Further patting combined with swift neck craning confirmed her horror. The back of her dress had gotten caught in her nylons when she stood and pulled them up. While the front of her dress was left quite undisturbed the back was bunched up around her backside.
Now Rachel likely would be thinking quickly enough to just turn to the Elders wink and blow them a kiss but sixteen year old Rachel was undoubtedly petrified. Running back to the restrooms to fix it would mean passing the Elders again so she instead retreated to the emptiest corner she could find turned her back towards it and pulled the dress out along with her dignity.
We thankfully were about done with the tour as I'm sure we couldn't have left fast enough for her. To her great credit we were all laughing about it before we'd left the parking lot.
And have been laughing still.
Likely so have those missionaries.
Hopefully so have you because they say if you can get them to laugh you can get them to help. And we need your help!
Vote! My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
Get your friends to vote! My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
Come back and do it again tomorrow.
My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
---------------------------------------------------------------------
To quote the marketing campaign of Laughing Cow Cheese. Have you laughed today?
More importantly have you laughed at yourself today?
Our family are proponents of laughing at yourself, which basically means if you aren't going to laugh at yourself you are going to be the only one not laughing but we won't let that stop the rest of us.
For some reason even the most horrifically mortifying experience that could happen to a young person* is almost instantly tempered if you can somehow muster to laugh about it.*[Or old person, I for one am not finished doing exceptionally embarrassing things even daily] Not to mention with researchers showing that laughter lengthens life, you are diffusing what the melodramatic part of you thinks 'just might kill you from embarrassment' and gives you even more time in mortality to laugh about it.
Take this family favorite story about the blog's current heroine Rachel for example.
She had fairly recently turned 16. Our family was on a grand expedition back East touring family, church and American History sites. As has already been proven by this weblog family vacations are a great way to mix things up just enough that everything becomes instantly more memorable and usually for very good reason.
On this particular vacation we had been to probably close to 20 church visitors centers which again is great because a). They're free; b). They've got very clean restrooms; c) they're usually not crowded d). they help you stay awake in Sunday School particularly when you're able to spend time thinking about this particular story* *[Just be sure to be able to explain the reason for your muffled laughter].
So we're at the Hill Cumorah Visitors Center. It's a Sunday so we had finished church earlier in the day and hadn't been anywhere we could change yet. Again another reason why church history sites are nice--you don't stand out nearly as much if your family is in white shirts & ties or dresses.
So as mentioned, we were always making sure we used a restroom at the Church history site because regardless of how many other stops we were making in a day there were no guarantees you wouldn't contract a communicable disease if you had to use their restroom.
Rachel had slipped away from our tour group to use the bathrooms which were on the other side of the visitor's center and said hi to a set of Elders [Male missionaries likely between the ages of 19-21] as she passed them at a help desk.
Rachel finished in the restroom and came out to join us again. She smiled as she approached the help desk and they smiled back. As she passed the desk and continued to walk towards us, one of the missionaries called out to her, 'Sister!' naturally she turned back only to see him pointing down and shout 'Your Dress!'.
Instinctively Rachelfirst put her hands down the back of her dress which she felt ended just at her waist where dress gave way to nylon. Further patting combined with swift neck craning confirmed her horror. The back of her dress had gotten caught in her nylons when she stood and pulled them up. While the front of her dress was left quite undisturbed the back was bunched up around her backside.
Now Rachel likely would be thinking quickly enough to just turn to the Elders wink and blow them a kiss but sixteen year old Rachel was undoubtedly petrified. Running back to the restrooms to fix it would mean passing the Elders again so she instead retreated to the emptiest corner she could find turned her back towards it and pulled the dress out along with her dignity.
We thankfully were about done with the tour as I'm sure we couldn't have left fast enough for her. To her great credit we were all laughing about it before we'd left the parking lot.
And have been laughing still.
Likely so have those missionaries.
Hopefully so have you because they say if you can get them to laugh you can get them to help. And we need your help!
Vote! My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
Get your friends to vote! My Dads Eyes: http://www.hoopesvision.com/contest/vote.html
Come back and do it again tomorrow.
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